I mean, it's such a hassle--- buying a real tree or assembling my artificial one that I've had for 14 years, untangling strings of lights, determining if I want to buy new ornaments or use the ones that I already have, etc...
First of all, let me clarify that I am not a "Scrooge". I stopped taking my Adderall about a month ago, at my doctor's direction, because he felt that I was depressed, so he switched my medication. This was bittersweet. I mean, I definitely feel that my mood has "enhanced", but I just can't seem to "get going" when I need to do ANYTHING. I don't wanna sound like it's a crutch, but when I have my Adderall, I feel like a damn superhero; I can do anything... and I DO.
It's like night and day. Without it, I am not motivated, I see things that need to be done, make a note in my mind to do them and then... they don't get done. I hate it. I don't know why the hell it's like that, but it is.
My living room was a mess for 2 weeks straight because I had gotten sick and was camped out on the couch in the living room until today. Smh. Pillows, my electric blanket, socks, shoes, bras... Everything was strewn upon "my territory". And, although it irked me to see such a mess, and I knew it should be tidied up, nothing could push me to do what I knew I needed to do. Clean the EFF up! Ugh.
Anyway, I feel the difference and I know why it exists. ADHD is NOT a made-up ailment/disability---whatever. It's as real as the air we breathe. Many have suggested that I try natural methods to "cure" it, but it, but those things have not worked for me. I NEED MY ADDERALL!!!
I eat well. My produce is mostly fresh and sometimes frozen. I season with fresh ground pepper, sea salt and other fresh herbs. The only things I buy in a box are pasta and cereal. I just don't get it.
Anyway, the tree is up. I even put the wreath on the door. My daughter is 5, so I suspect that I will be doing this for at least another 12 years (she graduates from high school when she is 17).
Okay. Enough rambling for now! My birthday is in 3 days... I'll be 38. Wow. I remember when my parents were 38. I thought that was old!
Merry Christmas!
Happy Hanukkah!
Happy Kwanzaa!
Happy Holidays!
